When things between you and you S.O. go a little rough, it's easy to think that breaking up is the only solution. But in relationships, especially the strong and committed ones, it should never be an option. Maintaining a healthy relationship is not easy, but it's crucial to keep in mind that giving up on something too soon and not giving it a chance can lead to regret.
During my first few months with my partner, there had been times when we broke up and got back together after a few days. We were both clueless when it comes to relationships before, that's why in every challenge that we faced, the first thing that comes to our minds is to break up.
Now, we finally know how to deal with our differences, and we understand that there are other choice to get through a challenging situation. I'm happy to share that we're in a much more loving and happier place now. That's why if you and your partner are planning to break up, listed down below are the reasons why you shouldn't!
1. Misunderstandings can be fixed.
No one wants to have a constant fight with their partner, and it's more frustrating when you fight over the same issues over and over again. However, having a lovers' quarrel is more normal than you think. My boyfriend and I don't always agree on things, and that's when misunderstandings start to arise. At first, I assumed that I was with the wrong person whenever we'd have conflict, but as time went by, I noticed how respectful we've become of each other. It's because we know that what matters more is how we manage our differences by compromising.
2. Staying in love needs work.
Unfortunately, those kilig feelings naturally fade with time. It doesn't mean you don't love them anymore, it means you've finally hit something real. It's easy to love someone; what's hard is staying in love. Sometimes, my partner and I would think that we wouldn't survive a certain rough patch, and the only solution for us was to break up. But after understanding that we're both willing to work things out to nurture our love towards each other, our relationship became better than before.
3. Your happiness depends on you.
One of the common mistakes that people usually make when they're in a relationship is being dependent on their partner. It's okay to want to be with them all the time because, well, they make you happy. What's not okay is when you start depending on them to the point that your happiness lies in what they do or feel. I also felt sad and annoyed when my partner didn't reach my expectations or whenever he wasn't happy. But I realized that this shouldn't be the case since we're two different people with different lives. Just because we're not blissful 100% of the time, it doesn't mean that we can't make it work.
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4. Fantasies are far from reality.
We all make these unrealistic fairytales about how our relationship should be. Whether it's high or low, too much expectations can lead to disappointment. Even I was once like this, but I realized that my partner can't read my mind, and he shouldn't have to. It's either you start being mature and realistic or you go find someone else. If you're smart, you'll take the first option.
5. Communication solves most relationship problems.
When you think that communication is the problem, it's usually just a matter of how you communicate. You might be saying something wrong or haven't learned each other's love languages. Either way, not talking to your partner because of this should never be a choice. I used to hate communicating because it's like making something a big deal when it isn't. But now, I've understood that it's better to talk it out than simply give up.
6. There's no perfect relationship.
It's normal to wonder if there's someone out there more compatible with you than your partner. While this is normal, it doesn't mean you should remain feeling like this. You have to know that there's a difference between satisfaction and contentment, and we should always strive for the latter. Whenever I think about breaking up with my partner, I weigh in whether it will cause me regret or not—and I always knew that it would. If they're a keeper, there's no need to think about what else "could be" outside of your relationship. Work on what you already have, and you'll never have regrets.
People fall in and out of love, that's the sad reality. It's because relationships aren't easy, and it's not always going to be rainbows and butterflies. It's all a part of this whole complicated thing called love. That's why before you decide to break up with your partner, take a step back and think more than twice if you're making the right decision.
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