By Angeline Cheng
We’ve all been there before: feeling down, loathing ourselves, letting our insecurities about other girls eat away the best of us. It’s an evil all of us are trying to combat. Sometimes it loses, sometimes it wins, and when it does, the outcome surely isn’t good-looking.
But the thing is that it’s perfectly normal to be insecure sometimes (what with all the gorgeous ladies around,) but there are ways that we can shut our insecurities down and emerge ourselves victorious in this tiresome battle. Here are some of the things you need to remember when the insecurity attacks become too heavy to handle:
1. You have to embrace your own unique beauty.
Sure, you may find other girls pretty. But bear in mind that what sets you apart from those girls is your uniqueness. You may have the urge to always stand out that you’re forgetting that you really don’t have to, because your own set of characteristics already makes you more interesting to begin with.
Other girls may have that long, sleek hair, but you have those adorable natural waves. They may have flawless, porcelain skin, but you have that to-die-for sultry sun-kissed glow. They may have a slammin’ sexy bod, but you have those empowering curves. It’s really all about loving your own.
2. The first person that should believe that you’re beautiful is no other than you.
Just think about it: How can others see your beauty if you yourself can’t see it first? As cliché as it sounds, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Beauty is subjective, and you always have to remember that positive thoughts should come from within you. And after that, everything else follows. Start believing in your own splendor and own it because it’s yours and yours alone.
3. Just because you find other girls beautiful doesn’t mean that you’re not.
Girl, the beauty of others is not the absence of your own. You have it in there within you; it’s innate, and no one could ever take it away from you. Stop overthinking about how other girls look because it will just make you miserable and forget your own beauty. Instead of being envious, learn to truly appreciate how they look. Remember, all girls are beautiful, and that certainly includes you!
4. Stop comparing other girls’ highlight reel to your backstage scene.
Ah, envy: the number one culprit behind those negative things inside your mind. It’s all too familiar: You’re lying in your bed, casually scrolling through a myriad of Facebook and Instagram posts, and then behold; there goes the picture of a girl with the perfect makeup, perfect hair, and perfect outfit. A sudden pang of jealousy enters your system. You look into the mirror, and you see your lousy bedhead hair, untamed brows, and frowning face staring right at you. Then you begin to ask yourself, “Why can’t I be like her?” There goes hating yourself.
But have you ever thought that not everything you see on social media is real? That it’s curated by everyone to show you exactly what they want you to see? No wonder every girl on the ‘Gram is pretty. But what you don’t see are the behind the scenes, that they aren’t as perfect as what they seem to be online. Don’t go comparing highlights to backstage because it’s definitely pointless.
5. Do whatever makes you feel beautiful.
Seriously, just do it. Want to go extra on makeup? You have the liberty to do so. Aiming for an OOTD look for your next grocery sesh with your mom? Then go for it! At the end of the day, your happiness, your comfort, and your confidence in your own skin should be your top priority. Go ahead and do what you want to do, if that makes you feel beautiful and good about yourself (without the expense of hurting other people, of course.)
But the most important thing that you should always remember is:
6. It’s not all about the looks.
What good is a lovely appearance when your personality is trash? A kind heart will always be greater than all the pretty faces in this world combined. Sure, that pretty face may bring you lots of short-lived compliments and a sense of pride, but being a good person will bring you a sense of fulfillment no amount of Instagram likes could ever give.
The next time you find yourself down in the dumps again because of your insecurities, just look in the mirror, take time to fully appreciate that stunning lady in front of you, smile, and say “I am beautiful because I am me.”
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