Whether you're still in high school or already a working adult, running into a friendship problem is still a norm these days. The saddest part is that there are misunderstandings that can possibly lead to two friends becoming strangers in a snap. Some of you might not know, but being the friend who always wants peace in your circle is quite hard, too!
Even if you try your best to stay out of it, it's totally a struggle to be in between two friends who are fighting. You don't want them to feel that you're turning against one of them (or even both of them,) that's why you end up being in a stickier situation. If you're currently experiencing this, here are the struggles we're sure you could relate to!
1. Listening to your friend talk bad about your other friend
You never want to hear someone talking bad about your friend, but it's even harder when it's coming from someone inside of your friend group. You don't want your friend to think that you care about them and their feelings, but at the same time you don't want your other friend to think you're talking behind their back. Unfortunately, when your friends are fighting, you can't stop them from talking bad about each other, even if you don't want to listen.
2. Being pressured to choose sides
No matter how small or big the misunderstanding is, when there's a fight inside your friend group, it's hard to not feel like you're being pressured to choose sides. Of course, your friends won't tell you to choose between them, but the way they're acting totally blows it. A part of you would choose the side of the person you're closest to, but you don't want to abandon your other friend just because they have a problem. That's why as much as you care about them, no one deserves to be the referee of an inner circle fight—even you.
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3. Needing to distance yourself
You want to be there for the two of them while they're figuring out how to end their fight. But the more they prolong their misunderstanding, the more it affects you since you're hanging out with them. We know that you don't want to do this since they're still your friends at the end of the day. But you also know that the best way to take care of your emotions is by distancing yourself from them even if you end up being alone for the mean time.
4. Wanting to solve the problem even if you're not involved.
Since you don't want to prolong their fight and go back to how things were before it all, it's understandable if you want to solve their problem even if you're not technically involved. We know that there's nothing wrong in calling out or stating your opinions to your friends regarding their fight, but it's not your job to manage other people's conflicts. Although you just want to end your struggles of taking care of the two, remember that the more you stress yourself with their problem, the more dysfunctional you will be.
5. Seeing their friendship fall apart
The hardest part when your friends are fighting is when you slowly see how they're drifting away from each other and you can't do anything about it. However, this is not always the case, and you might be lucky to have two friends who are willing to fix their misunderstanding. But sometimes, there are friendships that end in the process of unconsciously outgrowing each other. We know how terrible it feels to see them give up on working things out, but it's not worth it to feel emotionally unstable because of this.
At this point, all you can do is reassure your friends that their friendship is important to you. But if they're not willing to work things out, you don't deserve to be crushed between them. You can't control the outcome of their fight, but we hope it's something that helps you grow rather than pulls you down more.
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