People & Inspiration

Cheat Sheet: What To Do When You Think You've Been Ghosted

Cheat Sheet: What To Do When You Think You've Been Ghosted

 


Imagine finding someone that can make your heart literally beat faster than normal—your day is automatically made whenever you get to talk, and you know that you are more than friends. Then after some time, you feel them slowly pulling away, and, without a word, they disappear. That, my friends, is the common dating phenomenon known as being "ghosted".

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It is one of the most painful thing to experience because you will never know what went wrong for them to leave you hanging. There will be times when you’ll feel that you are unworthy of respect and proper closure.

So what do you do when someone you like suddenly became distant and pulled an awful disappearing act on you? Here, we listed the steps on handling this sort of situation without going a little too crazy:

Assess the situation, and do not jump into conclusions.

There is a very, very fine line between knowing the facts and over-reacting. You have to step back and look at the situation with the most open mind you could muster without your feelings clouding the way you see things. When you tried reaching them through all of the possible ways you could, got no response, and even see them being their normal self online when it comes to their friends, then they're clearly ignoring you which is dangerously bordering on ghosting.

Call them out.

After weeks of trying to get intouch with them, claim your rights and call them out. Tell them what you think and what you’re feeling. You should let them know that you're aware of what they're up to and that what they are doing isn’t cute. Even if it falls to deaf ears, at least you were able to release your thoughts and feelings to them.

Acknowledge your emotions.

By now, you should know that people who "ghost" aren't worth your time. But it doesn't mean that you have to force yourself to move on in an instant. Acknowledge your feelings, both positive and negative. Just because it ended badly, it doesn't mean that what you felt during your relationship wasn't real. At the same time, if you feel hurt, betrayed, lonely, angry, and even bitter, just let those heavy feelings in. Knowing that your feelings are valid is always the first and most crucial step to moving on.

Never blame yourself.

When you've been ghosted, it may alter your perception of your worthiness of being loved. That feeling is completely normal after suddenly being left hanging in the air. But you have to know that ghosting says more about the person who cut all communications without a proper goodbye than the person they left. Maybe they have not matured enough for confrontations and clean breaks, and that is never your fault.

Take as much lessons as you can.

It doesn’t matter if the relationship is long-term or you guys just met—easier said than done—but you don’t really have a choice but to let it go. Know that you are more than what they deserve. When you fall, you just have to get back up as quickly as possible. The world around you will not stop just because yours did—you have to keep swimming. Whether you like it or not, them ghosting you is just proof that they are not and will never be the one.

After all these tips and tricks, remember to respect your process of moving on. You may not get the closure  that you want from them, but you can pick yourself up and fill the bareness that they left through self-love and by sparking joy back into your life again.

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