People & Inspiration

In Focus: The Dos and Don’ts When You Have To Reject Someone

In Focus: The Dos and Don’ts When You Have To Reject Someone

 

By Bettina Francisco
Chalk Campus Correspondent

Having someone who likes you can be overwhelming because they surprise you with romantic gestures and overwhelming attention. We sometimes fall for them which can make us feel as if we are dazzled in a field full of flowers. It is nice to think that a prospect appreciates you and has fun being by your side. However, there are unfortunate instances when we would need to decline them because we may not be ready or they are just not our type.

Having to reject someone is never an easy task. Potentially breaking someone's heart can be a burden, but there are ways to ease the pain during the moment of rejection. Here are the dos and don’ts when having to reject someone.

DON’T lead them on. It's okay to spend time getting to know someone. But if you already find yourself at a point where you know it in your heart that they are not the person for you, don’t keep their hopes up.

DO tell them your decision right away. Be decisive as much as you can. Don't waste each other's time by holding it out for too long. Once you've made up your mind, don't beat around the bush, and simply tell them as soon as you can.

DON’T ignore them when they confess to you. Once the person has confessed, don’t ghost out and leave them hanging. Being rejected is painful enough as it is, and having no closure can make it harder for the other person to heal and move on.

DO talk to them face to face. You should have the courage to tell them your decision face to face so that it will feel like a heartfelt decision instead of a cold rejection. Having the courage to do it with an eye to eye conversation is always the matured way to go about this situation especially if both parties have seriously invested time and effort in getting to know each other.

DON’T sugar-coat your reasons on why you have to decline. It can be tempting to alter your reasons to sound like you don’t have bad intention. You may not want to hurt their feelings, but too much sugar-coating may give them even more false hope. 

DO tell them your honest reason. Have the guts to tell them the truth because, after all, we all deserve it. It would give them that proper closure and a good starting point to move on and better themselves if need be.

Letting someone down can make us feel like a bad person. But being honest is always the matured thing to do when feelings are involved. Don't be afraid to reject someone. If you do it right, you might just be doing them a huge favor by ending this certain chapter in their life and allowing them to start a new one.

ALSO READ: Daily Diaries: Why Giving Your Ex A Second Chance Is A Mistake

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