People & Inspiration

In Focus: 6 Signs That You And Your Bestie Are Growing Apart

In Focus: 6 Signs That You And Your Bestie Are Growing Apart

 

 

When you view someone as your best friend, we usually believe that it’s going to last forever. We believe that our friendship can survive anything to the point that even if everyone changes, you two will still stay the same.

And yes, there’s a ton of friendships that survive the misunderstandings, changes, and distance, and they do last forever. But, sometimes, that’s not the case. Even if you do your best to avoid it, some friendships fall apart. Friendships don’t always come to an end because of a dramatic fight. Most of the time, it ends simply because two people have grown apart. If these signs are as on point as Ariana Grande’s cat-eye with your friendship, then maybe it’s time to accept that it’s time to leave things in the past…including your bestie. 

1. It doesn’t affect you that they’re not talking to you.

As we grow older and get caught up with our school or work responsibilities, it’s expected that you can't hang out as often as before. But what makes a friendship special is finding time to check in and catching up on what’s going on in each other’s life. However, if neither you nor your bestie bothers to make an effort to know what’s up and hearing updates about them doesn’t interest you anymore, then that's a telltale sign that you're growing farther apart.

2. You have less things in common.

Of course, it’s impossible to be 100% similar to someone, since it’s actually our differences that make our friendships stronger. You see things from a different perspective, and you get to try new things because of them. But now, these differences become so apparent to the point that you literally have nothing to talk about anymore! You can’t find any common ground when it comes to your interests and priorities. Whatever you’re into, they can’t understand, and vice versa. And instead of enlightening one another, you choose to not talk about it.

3. They’re not your “go-to” person anymore.

They used to be the first person you go to when something good or bad happens to you. Acing a test, relationship problems, or being accepted in your dream college—any sort of news, name it, and they find out first. They were the first person you think of calling or texting when it happens. But now, you don’t even feel like reaching out anymore. You start venting out to your other friends or family members. And sometimes, they’re the last person to know about it.

4. You have not enjoyed their company as much as before.

There's never a day that you didn't enjoy hanging out with them that you wish you could keep them in your pocket. You just don't know how and why, but they can easily make you laugh. They were your happy pill. But now, when you do hangout, the silence that used to be comfortable became awkward. It’s like talking to a stranger, you started being worried about their opinions since you’re afraid that you’ll be judged or they’ll get annoyed at you. The security and comfort that were the reason you call them your bestie is gone.

5. The things you traditionally do together have lost its importance.

Whether it's watching the latest episode of Riverdale or going home together from school, you two have traditions that you never break at all costs. This kind of hangouts used to have a certain value to both of you. But now, tradition or not, you couldn’t care less if it doesn’t happen anymore—it’s either you make excuses to cancel plans, or they do.

6. You only ever talk about old memories and stopped making new ones.

There’s no denying that it’s hard to let go of someone you have a lot of memories with. Unconsciously, it becomes the number one reason as to why you’re still holding on to your friendship because you remember the good times fondly. And deep inside, you hope that you feel that spark again when you’re with them. But sometimes, just like in romantic relationships, nostalgia is not enough to hold a friendship together.

Ask yourself the reason why you still want to be besties with them–is it because you genuinely still see them as your best friend or is it because you’re still hoping things will go back to normal between the two of you? If it’s the latter, we guess it’s best to acknowledge the fact that you two grew apart. Though your friendship will never be the same again, know that you still hold a place in each other's hearts. After all, you once shared your whole life with them.

ALSO READ: In Focus: Why Brutally Honest Friends Are For Keeps

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