Being in a lasting relationship nowadays is a struggle as compared to what we used to hear from our parents' generation. There will come a time when the intense feelings you once shared with your S.O. will slowly fade, and it feels like settling more than being in love.
Admitting to yourself that a relationship you’ve invested your everything into is coming to an end—or at least knowing beforehand that this relationship it’s going to last or your partner–isn’t the easiest thing to accept. The mere fact that you clicked this article is already a warning sign that you are unsure of your present relationship. *sips tea*
If you need further proof, here are the obvious signs that your relationship isn’t meant to last even if you want it to.
1. You are unsure of them.
When doubt starts getting in your head and you’re questioning if this relationship is worth it, that’s when you know that it isn’t. It is painfully hard to admit that something you used to be sure about isn’t giving you a sense of security anymore. Things change, people change, and feelings change, and you have to accept when it's time to move on.
2. You are open for other “options.”
If you are in an open-relationship, then this isn’t a problem. But when a couple in a monogamous relationship starts looking for someone to fill in a void, then that is the start of the end as we know it. If you're utterly content and happy with your current partner, then you shouldn't be looking around anymore, right?
3. You don’t talk about the future.
A sure sign that a relationship isn’t going anywhere is when you do not talk about your future. Both of you are just living in the moment, “just vibing,” and “just going with the flow.” A lasting relationship should have a certain level of assurance, and you should see yourselves being with each other in the long run. If not, then that's a major red flag right there.
4. Your relationship has a problematic start.
If your relationship was built on angst, lies, deception, and hurt, there is a massive chance that this relationship isn’t meant to be. Whether your partner cheated on their ex with you or one of you was forced into the relationship, then it’s possible that it won’t last. Every relationship should be founded on honest and authentic feelings, no less.
5. You find it hard to be yourself when you're with them.
Trust and honesty are just some of the foundation of a lasting relationship. Being yourself with your partner should be like cutting a room temperature butter—smooth and easy. If you have to bite your tongue and swallow the bitter truth just to make the relationship work, sooner or later, you will see the cracks in the relationship you’ve been trying to conceal with your white lies.
6. You are neither arguing nor communicating.
Just because you’re not fighting doesn’t mean mean your relationship is a healthy one. In fact, it’s the other way around. What makes a relationship truly work is when you’re constantly communicating even if it may lead to arguing. If you’re not letting your thoughts and emotions out, then those skeletons in your closet will soon haunt you.
7. You do not grow as a person.
What a lasting relationship requires is for both parties to grow together and help each other to do so. When you feel like you two are stuck or you have different goals in life that you can't achieve because of your relationship, then it's a sure sign that you need to let go and accept that your time together has already ran its course.
It is hard to accept that a relationship you’ve valued dearly is coming to an end. But if you feel you're no loner helping each other to become better versions of yourselves, there is nothing to regret. You just have to take deep breaths, and let go. Know that you’ll get better and you’ll realize that you deserve better.
ALSO READ: In Focus: Qualities Millennials Should Have To Maintain A Lasting Relationship
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