by Joan Ko
Toxic people are everywhere, just waiting to be a menace in your life. But have you ever stopped to evaluate why you seem to magnitize their attention? Don't beat yourself up too much just yet. Sometimes, it’s because your strongest attributes make you an easier target than most. And you can work around that; you just need to address the possible causes.
Here are some reasons why toxic people always linger around you. We just hope that pinpointing them will make it easier for you to navigate within these challenging relationships on a daily basis.
1. You give too much of your time.
They will hold on to you if you’re willing to drop everything for them and as they demand more of your time, you'll soon start to feel regretful. You have to set the boundaries and make sure they respect you when you start putting yourself first.
2. You are an empathetic listener.
Because toxic people tend to hog all the attention, they’ll talk to you for hours when they know you're not complaining. The worst part is that they’ll ignore every body language and verbal cue you give off. Next time, limit your time when engaging in a convo with them. Show them and really tell them when you have to go. It may be awkward sometimes, but remember you're doing them a favor.
3. You always seem chill.
Your easygoing attitude makes them want to hang out with you more, and because you tend to be more chill in difficult times, you may find yourself saying yes to them more often than you might realize. Again, you can be helpful, but make sure to let them know of your conditions so they won't abuse your peaceful disposition.
4. You can't easily spot the "bad" in anyone.
You're genuinely too nice to the point of naivety at times. The high tolerance for toxic people may make you endure their negative sides longer than most people. Don't settle with their attitudes and stop making excuses for why they behave the way they do, so they can realize that changes should be made. Not everyone will be nice to you just because you are nice to them!
5. You get swayed by what they say.
These toxic people can't stand it when somebody corrects them, so when they sense that you are intently listening and taking part in their negative talk, they feel more empowered that they are right! Even if you slightly tell them they got some facts wrong, if you're not being upfront about it, they will just ignore your opinion and stick to pursuing their own issue. When you're ready to stand your ground, be prepared for a fight!
We all have our weak moments, but we should always learn to do something about them especially when we're already being taken advantage of. Do you think you can handle weeding the toxicity out of your life now?
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