The possiblity of being friends with your ex has been an age old debate. This can depend on different factors including the level of bitterness you have your breakup, the prior friendship you've share before being linked romantically, and whatnots. Truthfully, there's nothing wrong in wanting to be friends with your ex. However, no matter how hard you convince yourself and everyone else around you that there's nothing more than friendship between you and your ex, somehow, it doesn't really sound or feel right.
If you're the kind of person who swears they're "just friends" with their ex, you might want to check these signs that your heart is actually saying the opposite.
1. There's no emotional closure when you broke up. If you still have unanswered questions and various what-ifs hovering over you, then there's no actual closure that happened between the two of you. Every time you see, talk, or merely think about them, you know it in your heart that there's a void. And no matter how you try to shrink it, it's always going to be there.
2. You get extra excited when you know you're going to see them. Whenever you hang out with the same circle of friends, the idea of seeing your ex makes you giddy. Perhaps, they're the only reason why you actually want to go out. The thought of having a palusot to hang out with them without showing you're still not over them makes you extremely thankful. Admit it!
3. You want to look good whenever you're going to see them. Now that you've found the perfect excuse to see them, you exert extra effort when it comes to your look. Even if it's just a simple get-together, there's no such thing as being "overdressed." Whether they're with someone new or not, your mission is to make your ex regret that they let someone like you go.
4. You're updated with their life. You don't even have to stalk them on social media to know what's currently going on in their life. Maybe you took the initiative to send them a message asking them about their promotion at work, or they willingly told you that they will travel to Japan next month. And the moment a mutual friend asks you about your ex, you're able to answer like you guys are still in a relationship!
5. When something major happens to you, they're the one you want to make kwento to first. We don't blame you because you got used to talking to them 24/7. So when something good or bad happens in your life, they're the first one who pops in your head. Sometimes, you stop yourself from doing so because you know it's not something "friends" usually do. It's even more awkward if they're dating someone new already! Bummer!
6. You get hurt when they don't greet you on special occasions. Whether it's Christmas or your birthday, greeting each other is still a must for you. And when the day passes, and they haven't sent you a message yet, you surely get upset. The thought that they actually forgot makes you even feel more shattered.
7. You're lowkey touchy when you're around them. There's a huge difference between being flirty and lowkey touchy. Flirting is "normal" nowadays, especially if the two of you know that it has no malice. But being lowkey touchy with your ex, like putting your hand on their arm or pinching their cheeks "unconsciously" because they look cute, is a different level of connection between the two of you. Can't keep your hands to yourself, can you?
8. You still have feelings for them. And the ultimate telltale sign that you're certainly not in a million years just friends with your ex is when you secretly still have feelings for them. You know it. Your friends know it. Even your ex's friends know it. But even if it still stings sometimes, you just want to keep them in your life because the thought of losing them completely frightens you.
Feel completely attacked yet? Here's a tip: don't settle for the "just friends" label because at the end of the day, you're only putting your own heart at risk.
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