People & Inspiration

In Focus: 10 Struggles Only Extroverted Introverts Will Understand

In Focus: 10 Struggles Only Extroverted Introverts Will Understand



When you're an extroverted introvert, you're never quite sure where you stand in any social situation. With your personality falling (in)conveniently between reserved and outgoing, you're often misunderstood as most people often find you "complicated," "confusing," or even "pa-special."

TBH, though, you just wish you weren't so perplexing because your paradoxical self can often make life a struggle even for you. And, no, you're not weird—you're totally normal. You're just an extroverted introvert (in short, ambivert) and it's something to be proud of because you actually have the best of both worlds: The depth of an introspective introvert and the charisma of an extrovert.

However, just as it isn't easy being an introvert or an extrovert, being in the middle makes life even tougher and more perplexing. If you're an extroverted introvert, you're sure to relate to these #Problems!

1. People don't make you uncomfortable, but being around them too long exhausts you. You don't mind socializing and being with other people, but too much of it easily sucks all your energy. You always feel the need to retreat to your hermit cave to recharge before you can put yourself out there again. You simply can't even when your introvert self is just socially drained.


2. Some people think you're really quiet, but some people think you're a hoot. Because you're both introvert and extrovert, you tend to easily switch your personality from one to another depending on the situation you're in and the people you're with. You don't always treat each person in the same way since you're selectively social—hence, the different kinds of feedback.


3. You can party, but going out too much tires you because it takes too much of "alone time." There are days when you want to catch up with all of your friends, but then there are days when you'd rather stay at home and catch up with yourself. You constantly find yourself thinking, "Is this worth getting up and leaving my bed behind? But if I don't come, what if it'd be a great time and everyone ends up talking about how fun it is?" 


4. People are constantly surprised by your unpredictability. You can be quite talkative and outgoing, that's why some people tend to assume that nothing is left to know more about you because they think they know you. What they don't know is that there is still so much more to discover about you—like how deep your interests and thoughts run—when they get to know you even more.


5. You've got no problem with small talk, but it bores you—especially when it doesn't lead to meaningful conversations. You enjoy listening to other people and their stories, but if all you get from the person you're talking to are superficial things such as how good the weather is then there's no point in investing time and energy in a conversation that will go nowhere. 


6. You have no difficulty connecting with different people, but you're careful about who you invest your emotion and trust in. Your extrovert self enables you to easily experience surface-level connections with almost every person you meet, but your introvert side compels you to be careful who you open up to. There are few people who could make it to your inner circle—and these relationships are anything but surface level.


7. It's not easy finding a certain person who understands both sides of you. Most people know you for your "bubbly" side, while others only perceive you as "serious" or "contemplative." And when they discover that these two personalities actually co-exist in you, they find you weird or they misunderstand you. But when you meet a person who accepts and understands both sides of you, you know you've found a friend for life.


8. You find yourself too introverted in the company of extroverts and too extroverted in the crowd of introverts. Being an extroverted introvert often leads you to social exhaustion. After a couple of nights out with your extrovert pals, you just want to be alone. But, on the other hand, you find yourself going for another rager after hanging out with your introverted buddies. Because of this, you're usually fluctuating between your separate groups of extroverted and introverted friends.


9. Your friends (and, you, yourself) are often left confused with the excessive amount of alone time you need. People who meet you when you're at the peak of your extrovert self assume that you're the life of the party, but they're left dumbfounded whenever you turn down a night out on "one of those days" when you just prefer a quiet night to yourself. 


10. You're frustrated with the idea of a person being quantified simply as extrovert or introvert. You're always eager to learn more which among the two is your true personality type, but you often find yourself frustrated by the oversimplification of personalities as the description of extroverts is equated to "party animals" and "leaders" and introverts as labeled as "bookworms" and "unsociable." You refuse to be defined by a single label—it's almost like being a "divergent" in Veronica Roth's world. 


Can you say "Relate!" to any of these? If so, you're an extroverted introvert! Hey, it's not an easy life, but it's definitely fun!


ALSO READ: Daily Diaries: Things To Remember Whenever You Feel Like You're Not Good Enough


Banner photograph by Amy Treasure via Unsplash.




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