In the television series The Story of Us, viewers get to see a glimpse of what happens between couples dealing with the distance through the relationship of Tin and Macoy played by Kim Chiu and Xian Lim, respectively. But does distance equate to absence? And if so, does it really make the heart grow fonder or colder?
Real-life couples in a long distance relationship, medical student Nikita Gonzales and seaman Kim Sarmiento, weigh in, too, and share how they overcome the distance when the struggles become too real. Here are some points to ponder on:
There are ways. Play technology to your advantage. Buy a local sim, connect to the internet, do video calls. If the net connection sucks, shoot an email. Just do anything to keep the communication lines open. Nikita says, “Magastos… pero madali lang naman mag-adjust kasi nakakapag-usap din araw-araw… parang siya na din ‘yung social media ko.”
Keep yourself busy. Long distance relationships turn chaotic when one couldn’t handle the other’s clinginess or constant inquiry of whereabouts or whatnots; thus, this leads to doubts or lack of trust. It may be easier than done but the key here is to keep yourself busy. After all, you still both have your own life to live. Nikita reveals, “Nakatulong din ‘yung pag se-seaman niya sa pag me-Med study ko kasi mas may time ako to study.”
LDR couple Kim and Nikita both believe in give and take and going the extra mile if you want your relationship to last.
Make up for lost time. And when you’re both together physically, make the most out of the limited time. Plan ahead and don’t let a minute go to waste. Kim hopefully aspires, “Di naman ako habang buhay magba-barko, pag kaya na, pag stable na kahit paano, nag-iisip din ako mag-stop.”
Know that it’s worth the sacrifice. If you both ultimately believe in your love and making it last, keep in mind that going the extra mile or whatever you do shall always be worth the sacrifice. For Kim and Nikita, they have to deal with time difference all the time but they thrive despite this by learning how to give and take. They both agree, “Take turns, minsan siya naman yung nagpupuyat, minsan ako naman.”
Know your values. Being firmly planted in your values and priorities is essential and crucial if you want an LDR to work. There will certainly be temptations following you like a shadow. The question is: What are you going to do about it? Have the strength to shrug them off which you can only do so when you’re firm in your love for your partner and in your values.
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Photograph (banner) screencapped from ABS-CBN Entertainment's Official Youtube channel