You called it quits, parted ways. Then down the road, you meet again. By chance or by choice, it doesn’t matter. You felt something and that left you wondering if things would be different now should you try your love luck once more. It’s the big “maybe” that just won’t leave you until you see for yourself.
And so, you talked it out or maybe it “just happened”. The next thing you know, you’re officially together with your former partner, now significant other—again. But how do you make it work? Do you just leave it to blind faith and put it all on the line hoping things have gotten better now?
Actor JM de Guzman, who got back together with actress Jessy Mendiola weighs in and lets you in a few learnings of his own on how you can make it work.
- Be Vocal.
As with any relationships, communication in an effective manner is always, always crucial. You may be aware of the different languages of love and it goes to say, it differs for each person. Learn your partner’s love language if you haven’t yet. And if there are more problems, JM says, “Kung ano man ‘yon, kung may hang ups, kung may mga bagay na tingin niyo andun padin na nag ca-cause ng problema sainyo, communicate agad. Pag-usapan.”
- Give and Take.
This may seem basic but it’s easier said than done. It doesn’t have to be material gifting or even emotional investment. Sometimes it’s the maturity that comes with it. “Yon isa dapat naki-kinig, ‘yon isa dapat nagiging honest… and the other way around.”
- Do things you don’t normally do before.
Complacency is a silent enemy of any relationship and so, doing things together—not just things but new things—may keep your days interesting. “Mga bagay na di namin ginagawa before like working out together, nag-uusap ng malalim, and mas nag-aalagaan.”
Getting back together is just half of the equation. Staying together, now that’s the other and harder half only a few manage to work on. As added motivation, just keep in mind the rewards can be sweet. For JM, “I believe love is sweeter the second time around. Kasi kung talagang pinag-bigyan niyo ‘yun love na ‘yon, meron conscious effort and meron talagang willingness, ibig sabihin both are willing to make it work again. Siyempre ‘yun resulta ‘non mas sweet.”