Every now and then, women find themselves wondering if chivalry is still well and alive. Was it the man sitting across you who could care less if you stand there the whole 13 stations of MRT? Or was it the young fella who instead of lending a hand while you carry a handful of groceries decided to just speed walk past you?
You may have lowered your expectations from men these days but that’s not to generally say chivalry is dead because to be upfront, I don’t think it is or ever was. It’s just that the way men embody chivalry simply evolves over time. You may not always witness it as the grand yet equally simple gesture of men holding the door open for you or offering you a bus seat (although that would still be nice). But there are also a gazillion of other ways a man can still show you he’s a true blue gentleman which you can decode yourself if you aren’t too spoiled of a woman.
Here are five ways to tell if you still have a gentleman in your midst even if at first it doesn’t look like it.
He stays away from the girl fights and drama.
He may be your boyfriend or your best buddy and admit it, you would rather have him by and on your side. But in most cases, he stays neutral and leaves you and your girlfriends to your business. Don’t get him wrong, he’s on your side. But he prefers to reserve judgment for things than don’t concern him. And if he thinks you’re in the wrong? Well, he also won’t hesitate to give it to you gently or straight, whichever you can handle.
He adds some thought to the most mundane things.
Whether it’s a glass of water or a more comfortable chair to sit on, he got it – sometimes even before you ask! But then if you noticed, it only said “some thought” because come on, you don’t seriously expect them to use up all their energy and mind power on how they can best pour you that glass of water, do you?
He treats everyone equally.
Or at least, tries to. Understandably, the word “gentleman” is almost always placed opposite of the female gender. But you know he’s a rare kind when he doesn’t choose gender to whom he’ll be gentlemanly with. He just acts like it. He just is.
He knows boundaries.
Nothing you do or say would make a true gentleman cross the line. Nope, not even your bodycon dress or see-through top or high-slit skirt. He won’t care about mixed signals so unless you tell him straight what exactly you want to happen, he’s not acting on it. The catch? He might never initiate to ask you either. So best of luck to your first-move game.
He chooses his words wisely.
He may feel strongly about certain things and/or people but rarely will you see derogatory words leave his lips. He knows the weight of words and he knows how to use them or in most cases, when not to use them.
Now this doesn’t aim to convince you that chivalry still exists. We won't even tell you to look for it in the small things. Often it’s in the silence of their actions and not in the grandest measures that you truly feel safe and sound with a genuine kind of gentleman. So really, all you have to do is listen.